In most cultures historically they’ve had a “rite of passage” where boys transition into being a man. They learn what it means to be a good person. They endure some hard stuff. They go on adventures. And they enter the world knowing what they are capable of.
I want to give you that gift.
I want you to know that the world is a magical, beautiful place. And that you have a role to play in making it better.
I want you to know what it’s like to do hard things. To overcome fear and feel the thrill of accomplishing something hard.
I want you to feel capable. That you will know how to do what needs to be done when it needs to be done. I want you to feel comfortable and confident in different situations - in class, on the basketball or tennis court, in the woods, in the kitchen, on a date, meeting a grown up, etc.
I want you to not worry about whether you are good enough - I want you to be able to feel in your bones that God created you exactly the way you are, and he put you on this planet at this time, with this family, in this town, on purpose. I want you to have confidence in who you are, and to know that if you work hard and discipline yourself you can accomplish literally anything you want in life.
You are going to hear lots of messages as you get older about what men should and shouldn’t be like. There have been lots of bad things individual men have done in the past, and our culture is trying to course correct. A lot of it is good.
But I worry it risks throwing out some of the good things. I believe the world needs smart, strong, capable, thoughtful, brave men. And I want to help you become one of those people.
This is going to be a multi-year journey. We’re going to spend a lot of time together. A lot of it will be talking, thinking, reflecting. But we’re also going to do some adventures together.
I’m going to be figuring a lot of this out on the fly. As you know my dad and mom got divorced when I was a little kid. Poopah came into my life in junior high, and he was incredible as a step dad. But I had to figure a lot of this out on my own. I can’t promise I’ll do everything right as we go through this process. But I just want you to know where my heart is coming from.
You’re going to make mistakes. All the time. It’s not about being perfect. I don’t want any of this to be about guilt, or a bunch of things you “should” do or be.
This is about giving you confidence. I want you to see your life as good, even when it’s hard. This world as good, even if it’s broken.
I love you. I’m so incredibly proud of the boy you’ve become. And I am looking forward to going on this journey with you. I can’t wait to see the man you become.